12/31/04, 1:38am.
You think I only think about you when we're both in the same room...
Time flies. Or so they say.

Today was the shopping trip to Champaign. My mother and I spent hours in a car together. Luckily, we had Zoe with...and I slept most of the way there and about half of the way back.

My only purchases of the day were more Fiestaware. I got a Cinnabar carafe and 4 ramekins (spelling?)...in Sunflower Yellow, Shamrock, Plum and Scarlet. Under $40, not bad.

We lunched at Olive Garden, then hit up some other stores around. It was good to see my sister, though it has only been 4 days since she left up here. My mother's reasoning to this whole trip was that she wants to spend as much time with us kids before she moves down to Florida. Of course the obvious response would be "don't move down to Florida" but I suppose it's a little late for that.

We got home around 6:30, picked up Daddy and Chris and headed for dinner at Panera. After which I got ready for Nikki's party and drove again down to Deerfield...well, Riverwoods, actually. I need gas. Again. I am driving so much these days. Maybe if I didn't live so far away from everyone I want to be with...

Enough bitterness. It certainly isn't doing anything to help the situation. It's just all so upsetting. But I don't want to get into this now, cause I'm not in a place where I want to deal with this right now and the outburst of emotions that comes with it. I know eventually the floodgates will open, and all hell will break loose, but for now, I'm trying to keep it together. Ha.

Tomorrow...well technically today, is New Year's Eve, so I should focus on that and hope for the best. However, I have an odd sense of dread, so we'll hope that it subsides and all will be good. It should be a fine turnout. I was worried at first, but maybe I should have let sleeping dogs lie. Whatever that's supposed to mean.

As a last point of business...I need headphones. I come home at night and spend at least two hours silently typing, browsing the internet, and talking to people...all the while having no music, for fear the parents will hear. So I should invest in a nice pair of headphones, ones that will help block out external sounds as well as give me wonderful submersion into an ocean of music. I think I've used far too many metaphors and other such nonsense in this entry. I suck.

Current Music: Call and Answer - Barenaked Ladies

12/29/04, 7:53pm.
I've lost all resistance, and crossed some borderline...
Yesterday I babysat for my niece all day, again. I purchased the entire series of Sex and the City, as Best Buy was offering all 6 seasons for $80 off. I also picked up Garden State because yes. I hung out with my sister later in the evening and went to dinner with her and Zoe. Boring, but good.

Today, I went to help with the Dolphin Show build. Was good...I helped do a bit of build-type stuff, but mostly did painting. And thus, I looked like a multi-shade Smurf by the end. I had paint everywhere, including my face and hair (which I blame on Crystal, who was painting over me). It was pretty fun, considering. And I felt good helping and doing crew stuff again. So yay.

I came back to the apartment for a free dinner with the parents and Zoe. Now, I'm waiting around until about 8:30 when I'll head back to Deerfield to meet Allie at the B&N Cafe to catch up, and say goodbye. She leaves tomorrow for New York, and then heads straight to school from there. So I probably won't see her until Spring break. After that, I'll be heading to Baker's Square for Steph Berube's birthday celebration. Yay for Steph and PIE!!!

Currently, my dad and I are watching "Lost". You're all fired for not telling me Dominic Monaghan is in a TV show. And I'm uber confused. We don't understand what's going on at all. Like the reality turns to island and wha???

Tomorrow I'm shopping down in Champaign (yeah, it doesn't make sense) so I'll be far away until night, when I'll be at Nikki's. Use the cell phone, I have plenty of minutes. :-)

Current Music: As Long As You're Mine - Wicked

12/27/04, 12:38pm.
It was more than okay, but I pushed her away...
Last night was pretty good, all things considered. It started, as I mentioned previously, with a drive. It was a little after 5pm and I knew I needed to get away from things. And without a room to shut myself in, my only option was my car. I started with a destination of the Shell station on Grand Avenue in Gurnee. It's close-ish to the apartment (maybe 8 minutes) and it's always much cheaper than other places. I still had probably a third of a tank left, but it's winter so I don't want things to freeze. And it gave me somewhere to go.

Earlier I had looked up movie times for The Life Aquatic, so I gave Zoe a call as I started driving. She was in, so I had a plan for the evening. Except that the movie was at 7:40, and I said I'd pick her up around 7...which meant I had over an hour and a half with nothing to do. So I drove. From Grand Avenue, I headed south on Hunt Club Road until it dead-ends into 120 in Grayslake. I went east a bit and caught 21 (Milwaukee Avenue) heading south. That I was on for a while, and I did most of my calls there. I think I made about 7...and left messages on all of them that have voice mail (hint to Charlie to set his up). I was on Milwaukee past Vernon Hills and Lincolnshire. I turned onto Deerfield Parkway heading west and took it until 83, where I went south. Eventually, 83 forked off, but I continued south and the street became Wheeling Road. I got pretty far south on that. Into Cook county, and continued to Euclid, which I took to go back east. It had been about 40 minutes, so I decided to head back semi-toward Deerfield. Euclid, of course, turns into Lake in Glenview. I continued on that over the Edens and took it out to Ridge. I decided to start heading somewhat North in my destination. I was going to go all the way out to Sheridan, but I was worried about the time crunch. Ridge curve around to Greenbay and I took that further North. I had some fun looking at pretty houses on tiny streets, winding north and west before hitting Hibbard, and heading North. It dead ends into Tower, so I went west and got on the Edens there. Caitlin called me back, the first person I heard from, and she declined coming to the movie. But within the next ten minutes I had heard from Rob, who said he and Goldy would come, and Nikki who said she'd already seen it, but would join us later.

I got into Deerfield at 6:58, so I hit the ATM and picked up Zoe. We met Rob and Goldy at the movie and saw a lot of other random people we went to high school with. Odd. But I liked the movie. A lot of people were disappointed, but it was on par with what I had been expecting. I knew it wouldn't be as good at The Royal Tennenbaums, but it would be silly to think they would be the same. Wes Anderson's movies are all pretty different, yet have his trademark style. So I liked it and I thought it was funny.

After the movie, Goldy was awesome enough to lend us his house, with his amazingly awesome basement of joy. Seriously...his basement is all I ever need or want out of life. I think I could live down there for eternity and be content. Nikki joined, then Amanda. Later, Jason showed up and Chazz and John were a little later. It ended up being a pretty good turn out. We watched Jurassic Park on the projection screen, in the amazing leather chairs that are set up in stadium seating...and the front row with "Buttkickers," under-seat subwoofers. It was sweet.

The gathering dissipated and we all left around 2:30am. The drive up to Lake Bluff is getting more and more tedious. It was never bad when my sister was in these apartments, but my resentment for the entire situation has made things so much worse. I wish I could just get over it, but I can't.

This morning I woke up at 9:30...just about the latest I've slept all break. My throat hurts, so I'm drinking a lot of orange juice, and I took a DayQuil as preventative measure. I watched the scene of Coffee and Cigarettes with Cate Blanchett (nominated for Best Supporting Actress, Independent Spirit Awards) and then put in Door in the Floor (nominated for Best Screenplay and Best Actor - Jeff Bridges). It was good, I enjoyed it a lot. At 10:30, halfway through Door... my sister called to warn me she's be dropping off Zoe. Apparently I get to babysit today. Nice of them to let me know. It's okay though, it's not like I have a life of my own and I could possibly be busy or anything like that. Oh, and my mom sent an email saying I'd have her all day tomorrow too. A little warning would be nice. How the hell am I supposed to go job searching with a child in tow? And there's no way in hell I'm standing in line at the post office for a passport with an 8 year old. So I suppose I have Wednesday. Thursday, my mom and I are going shopping in Champaign, IL, where we will meet my sister Fayanne. It's about an hour for her, and two+ for us. Thrilling. But family calls, so I must do it. As long as I'm home by 8:30 for Nikki's birthday, I'm fine. And then Friday is New Year's Eve...another week shot to hell.

Well, me and my achy self are going to go take a nap in my dad's room, and leave the kid to play GameBoy in the living room. We'll see how long that lasts.

Current Music: RENT, stuck in my head. And the child. Who doesn't stop talking. Ever.

12/26/04, 4:44pm.
...
4:44...make a wish. Something tells me mine won't come true. Heh.

Day after Christmas extravaganza. Yesterday, I was tipped off by my sister-in-law that they were retiring Cinnabar as a color of Fiestaware, and thus, it would be on uber sale at Carsons. I don't know if anyone outside my family knows, but I collect it so that eventually when I move out and live on my own, I'll have pretty china. Anywho, this afternoon, my parents and I went on a Hunt for Red Fiesta (hehe...Hunt for Red October? Anyone? Bah...) which started at Hawthorn. The Carson Pirie Scott there sucks, by the way, and had no home ware what so ever. Bummer. Next we went across the street to Linens N Things, but not only was their selection shotty, but they were full price. Boo. We left empty-handed.

Daddy suggested we go down to Glenview, where the huge Carsons is located...and not in a mall. Plus for the lessening of crazy drivers. There, we found an abundance of Fiesta. It was truly a party. So I got a 5-piece place setting of Cinnabar for 50% off ($20). The rest of their stock of Fiestaware was also 30% off. I don't believe it goes on sale much, and so Mama said we should take advantage. Oh boy, we did. Two serving platters (Sunflower and Shamrock), a Shamrock Pitcher, a 2-Quart dish (Tangerine) and a 1-Quart Black dish. Also, a Cobalt Blue gravy boat, Tangerine salt and pepper shakers and a Turquoise spoon rest. Sadly, no butter dish...the Cinnabar one was chipped. :-( But I made out like a bandit. And our overall savings was about $100, a savings of about 36%. You can figure out for yourself how much we paid.

So that was sweet. Now I'm trying to plan a gathering for tonight. Coming up against many brick walls, due to a lack of location. The lack of a house has become detrimental to my social life. I'm now a huge mooch of houses. But we've already used Allie's house and Candace's house last week. And Rob no longer has a basement. Nikki and Caitlin will be having gatherings later in the week. There isn't much left after that. I guess we haven't been to Candace's in over a week...so maybe that will work? Maybe if Amanda gets home early-ish from her Christmas in Mount Prospect (where they were eating dinner at 4), we could maybe invade that home. Oy, the pain.

I'm thinking to make things easier, I'll start the evening with a movie. The Life Aquatic is playing at 7:40, so then we wouldn't need a house to chill at until 10-ish. I should start advertising that...and calling people.

I need my own room. So maybe I'll go for a drive. If only I had a destination. Arg.

Current Music: The NFL football theme. You know the one. Carolina/Tampa Bay game is on.

12/25/04, 10:32pm.
And if that joy, that thrill doesn't thrill like you think it will...
Merry Christmas.

I'm back from the proverbial dead. I have been almost entirely without internet for the past couple days. This has been due to spending a lot of time at my sister's house, where her computer had crapped out. Have no fear, we installed a new hard drive (she and I started it, then Brad fixed it and made it actually work. Bah) and now it's better. And now I'm back at the apartment, so there's that too.

I'd go through day by day, but I can't remember that far back and everything is a whirlwind of activity. But there was much shopping before Christmas, and very much family time. The 23rd consisted of an impromptu family dinner of 8 at the Silo to celebrate the arrive of Fayanne and Brad. That night I spent at my sister's so that I could "help her prepare for Christmas Eve" or something like that. The 24th was cooking a dinner (crock pot beef stew, so there wasn't a whole lot to "cook") and Chris did all the preparations for that. I played PS2. It was an even trade. She and I made a trip to the PACKED Jewel...never go to the grocery store on Christmas Eve. That's my rule to all of you.

We picked up some lunch and not long after getting home, Fayanne and Brad came over. Brad did the fixing of the computer (jumper in the wrong position...or something). Eventually, the entire immediate family showed up. We watched the end of the Green Bay/Minnesota game (WTF?) and ate a yummy meal. After that, we opened presents. So I now have a camcorder, which I had picked out earlier in the week, and my accessories for it. Plus some other little stuff like a hot chocolate blender thing and a Max and Erma's gift card. Mmm...food. From my sister, I got Citizen Ruth and LA Confidential. Rock on.

After dinner, poker was set up, with a $1 in. I played. Mostly Texas Hold-Em, 5-Card Draw and 7-Card Stud. Came in 4th of 7. Not too shabby. And since there was no way I was beating Brad or Tom, I kinda came in second. A little after 10, we started packing up. Those who were going home left, and Mom, Zoe, Emily, Chris and I went to the Candlelight Service at church. It's the one time of year I go to church anymore, and it's honestly because I get to have fire. And because my sisters and I always end up being terribly inappropriate and cracking up at stupid things both before and during the service. We try not to be loud or disruptive, but Mama usually gives us the evil eye every once in a while. After that, I came back to the apartment with Mama and quickly went to sleep. I would have done some internet stuff, like check email since I hadn't in over 36 hours, which is just uncalled for, but I had left my computer at Chris's house.

Today, I woke up around 9, which was late, as we were supposed to be leaving for Dave and Katie's at 9...for brunch. But we left a little late, got there a little late...and it wasn't really a big deal. Brunch was good, then we had an intense game of Scene It going on. My team didn't win, which was disappointing, but we came back from far behind (having had the luck of rolling 1s very often) and almost was able to get it. The game should have ended before that though, but Katie's brother was picky and obviously didn't want to lose. Fayanne and Brad were the winners, so no dice either way.

After that, I went back to Chris's, where I finally got her cable modem set up, however, there was an issue with her service, so she has to call Comcast. Bugger. At least it's working. Next step, add the wireless router in, and I can take my computer over there and accomplish something. Mom called and said she left the gifts at the apartment, and she was already on her way to my Aunt Bonnie's for dinner. So I got the fun chore of driving from Antioch to Lake Bluff, pick up the gifts and put down my computer and camcorder (poor things were going to freeze in my car) and then drive to McHenry. *shudder* Without counting the 3 minute stop into the apartment, it was over an hour drive. Not only was I tired, but disgruntled from the long and boring route. I usually enjoy driving, but that was a long time to be in a car. Bonnie's house was cold, per usual. Not as bad as it sometimes is if we get stuck in the basement. But it was a bit tedious sitting around. And only half of the family was really there. Judy and her family were down in Florida, Sharon and her family were in Ohio, and Denise is up in the UP of Michigan. So it left Donna, Bonnie and my Mom as the sisters. Uber tiny at 16 people. Soon, we were discussing cutting the cords and making Christmas exclusively immediate family. It's gotta happen sometime, and we're big enough. Dinner was alright. I was hoping for better stuffing (it was dry and had raisins. Eww) and the potatoes were bland (nothing a little salt doesn't fix). Then were were gifts. I have $50 to Best Buy and a pretty mirrored jewelry box. Desserts were slim, but acceptable. Then it was time to head out while the going was good. I drove Chris and Zoe home, and hung there for a tiny bit to break up the trip before coming back to the apartment. I'm very tired. It has been a long couple days. I'm hoping to recover during the day tomorrow, then have a shindig tomorrow night. I planned the last one, but it doesn't work so well because I need a house at which to base it. Last time I had Allie do it. The time before, I swindled my way into Candace's. I need to find my next sucker willing to host a gathering. I'm such a mooch. Bah!

Alright, time to catch up on some websites and some stories that I haven't been able to get to due to lack of internet. Then bed. For sure.

Current Music: Thank Goodness - Wicked

12/21/04, 10:56pm.
Have yourself a merry little Christmas...
I was SO productive today. Which is mighty incredibly...considering. I still have so much on my to-do list, but I'm getting there.

This morning, I started looking into schools. And further, started applying to them. In this one day, I filled out applications online for 6 schools, sent them in, and paid the application fees (averaging $30, meaning I just paid over $185). AND, I have written to the registrar to request transcripts for those 6 universities (another $54). It was time consuming and expensive. And I still have at least two schools to consider. Plus, I have to get high school transcripts sent out too. Don't really know how to go about that, since the high school is closed currently. Either way, it's nice to have those out of the way.

Tomorrow, I'll be going to Home Depot to get the parents gift cards for Christmas. It's unoriginal, but it's something they will need and use once they get down to Florida and have to do all that stuff to the new house. I should start going around and whore myself out to corporate America pick up job applications. I really need to be doing something for the next 6 months. But I'm worried I won't be able to find anything. And that leads to further anxiety of the monatary-sort, but I'm not going into that here. That's what I have a private journal for.

Well, the next few days will be much busier than these past few. Still weird to think that I haven't even been home a week. So much shit.

Alright, bedtime. As soon as M*A*S*H* is over.

Current Music: Christmas carols in just about every commercial.

12/19/04, 11:27pm.
You left your thumbprint inside me now for months it seems but mine only brushes your soft surface...
Fun evening. Took myself to see National Treasure...kinda a dumbed down version of DaVinci Code. They didn't really explain the history of it, but if you didn't already know it, than it wasn't overly important to the plot. Very much unrealistic, but intriguing none the less. And it was entertaining, which is always good. I liked Nicholas Cage in this roll. Often he is hit or miss with me. Jon Voight was not good, however, and makes me worry that perhaps he's getting too old to be good. He was still solid in Enemy of the State, but that was 5 years ago.

After, I called Candace to invite her to dinner, and half invited myself over to her house to hang for a bit until dinnertime. Also called Allie to join us and the three of us went to Panera and hung there for a while. At 8:30, we realized that Panera had actually closed at 8, so we left and Candace and I headed to Barnes & Noble to meet up with Pat and Charlie. We stayed there until almost closing at 11, and I took Candace home then headed back here to the apartment.

I realize that I'm very bitter about this apartment situation. And more over, I'm whining about it every other word that exits my mouth. Which sucks because now I'm the 'annoying bitter chick'. All I'm asking for is a little pity. A little understanding, maybe. But no one can understand unless they've been through it. And here...no one has.

So now, I'm going to make myself a list of things I must accomplish (sooner rather than later, though I'm not putting a due date on it). Exciting I know. Tomorrow, I have a doctor's appointment and then Christmas shopping with Mama. Not so excited about either. More money down the drain. Fucking doctors cost so much money. I hate them all.

Current Music: Zero Percent - Jason Mraz

12/19/04, 9:13am.
I know that you feel helpless now and I know you feel alone...
So I'm the greatest ever.

Last night I beat Kingdom Hearts (the game for PS2). After investing more than 37 hours of my life over 5 months, I reached the end. And won.

I didn't complete the entire game in the sense that there were side quests and other stuff that I didn't entirely complete. I think I found 87 of the 99 puppies. I don't remember if I finished the 100 Acre Wood, and I know I didn't get all of the trinity points...but hey. I did almost everything.

And now I feel incomplete. I have nothing left to accomplish. And Kingdom Hearts II doesn't come out until September 2005. Boooo.

In non-geeky gamey news, I took the kids to see Lemony Snicket's...Events yesterday. It was actually very good, considering it was a kid movie. I mean, the obvious comparison would be Harry Potter, since they are both book to movie, they feature pre-teen kids, there's some sort of dark evil force, and adults end up being the people who get in the way of everything. I would say that it is at that caliber (not like Spy Kids or other dumb kid-aimed movies), and without the crazy fan-following or need to be obsessed to appreciate. Because I love the HP movies...but then again, I'm obsessed. I feel anyone walking in the theatre will find something they enjoy. Plus, the cast was really good.

I don't like Jim Carrey, but that's been said before, and in this role he was alright. The kid actors were both surprisingly good. Emily Browning and Liam Aiken play the older Baudelaire children. They each had a few credits under their belt previously, but nothing big. Much potential there, I feel. And the auxilary cast is awesome. Billy Connolly and Meryl Streep play two of their crazy "relative/guardians" and both are excellent. I love me some Billy Connolly anyway, and his character was wonderful. Timothy Spall, better known as Peter Pettigrew from HPatPoA, plays lawyer Mr. Poe and Catherine O'Hara is a judge and neighbor. Jude Law plays Lemony Snicket and done the voice over for the story, as well as typewriting in shadow, so I'm fairly certain most of those scenes were body double. But still...feeling the Jude Law love over here.

Luiz Guzman, Cedric the Entertainer and Jennifer Coolidge all have small roles and Dustin Hoffman makes a cameo appearance. Jane Lynch is in a very brief scene, and I must admit, after seeing Catherine O'Hara, Jeniffer Coolidge and Jane Lynch, I was waiting for Eugene Levy, Parker Posey or other Christopher Guest-famed actors to appear, but alas, three is the limit. Good stuff though.

So yeah, I would recommend it. Obviously I didn't talk much about plot, but that you should see for yourself. It's interesting, and I really enjoyed it. It was dark, but the title, as well as the intro/monologue by Lemony Snicket tells that. Well worth matinee OR evening ticket prices (and I do not promote $9 movies much). Speaking of which, I have many on my list to see. Perhaps I will take myself out to a film tonight. Or tonight before 6pm so I get matinee rates. :-)

Current Music: The Road I'm On - 3 Doors Down

12/18/04, 2:24pm.
I'm feeling all very sexual but feeling all by myself instead...
Scheweeeeeeeeet.

Totally got a 95% on my Stage Management final, which allowed me to maintain my A- for the semester. Rock. I also pulled off a B+ in French...which exceeded expectation a bit considering that final. My Comparative Lit class was a solid A. Which I was expecting, considering I don't think he actually read anyone's papers or tests, and graded solely on length.

Picasso grades have yet to be submitted. While I'm expecting a B, I'm hoping to pull off and A-. My last two tests were B range, but my participation and collage project both received As. And I think I kicked that final's ass. She said she'd post grades on Sunday (tomorrow).

Me and my 3.62 cummulative GPA are taking the kids to see Lemony Snicket's... now. :-)

Current Music: Conversation with Myself - Jason Mraz

12/17/04, 11:41pm.
'Cause you and I both loved what you and I spoke of...
Eventful day, considering what I have as a comparison. I haven't been out in a while, so the Crew Break Party was excellent. Got to see lots of people that I enjoy, and talked with and hung out with them. We stayed a surprisingly long time...leaving around 6:30pm. Back in the day, I remember break parties that lasted until 9pm, but those were the days of yore. After the party, 11 of us went to Olive Garden which was some good times. One kid that was dragged along was only 14...a freshman. Geez, talk about making me feel OLD. After that, we mostly scattered, but Zoe, Tony, Johnson and I went back to Candace's where we started to watch Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Akzaban. Zoe and Tony left about halfway though, and Johnson and I about a half hour later. We were all pretty tired, and I knew I had a bit of a drive ahead of me. It was probably only 15 minutes from when I dropped off Johnson to when I got to the apartment, but that's over double the time it would have taken me to get home. But I guess I really can't call it "home" anymore. If I haven't mentioned yet, I hate the apartment and everything it stands for.

Currently, I'm sitting in a dark living room, trying to type silently with my computer screen as dim as possible and the sound muted. This is because in this very same room, both Michael and Zoe are sleeping. So tonight, not only is my "bedroom" a living room, and I'm sleeping on the couch...but I have two roommates. It's bad enough I don't have a space of my own, but I have to share what little space I have! And I can guarantee the 8 and 11 year olds will be up with the sun. Not amused, party of one.

Well, I should get to sleep...since I have nothing better to do. How fucking sad? And with that, I am off.

Current Music: You and I Both - Jason Mraz

12/17/04, 1:41pm.
Everyone is waiting for you're entrance so don't disappoint them...
Just got my IFP Netflix account...so I can start getting free movies that are nominated for the Independent Spirit Awards. Rock. I've already seen three on the list, but I'm going to rewatch the part of Coffee and Cigarette that features Cate Blanchett (I think I liked that segment) and Garden State...just cause it's good. I deleted Before Sunset from my Queue, on account of I own it. And who am I kidding? I'm going to buy Garden State when it comes out in two weeks.

Anyway, there are several which have not been released on DVD yet, some of which haven't been released in theatres. I'm planning to see Motorcycle Diaries at Rivertree in the next week, and The Sea Inside at Renaissance in Highland Park. Hopefully, a couple of the others which are still in limited release, will at least make it to Renaissance before the voting ends. It would be a shame to not see one of the films because of unavailability. The first films on my list...which should be shipping later today, are Door in the Floor, which I never made it out to see...so yay, and Maria Full of Grace (same reason). Also, Redemption with Jamie Foxx, who is supposed to be excellent in it. Rock on.

Plans for today: in 45 minutes, I'll head to the high school for the Crew Break Party. I'm excited. In that passive way. Until then, I'm going to hunt down my TV show DVD case and watch the season finale of Nip/Tuck. I will then check out this "On Demand" feature of digital cable, and possibly catch up on the entire second season that I haven't seen because we didn't have FX at school. Schweet. Digital cable rocks.

Current Music: Black and White - Sarah McLachlan

12/16/04, 3:32pm.
Through the years I've grown to love you, though your commitment to most would offend...
Crazy day yesterday.

I had an awful time sleeping, waking up first at 5:45am and then several times after. I finally just got up at 8:30 and packed up my bedding and hauled a few loads out to my car and then showered and got ready for my Picasso final. It became physically impossible for me to study anymore, but I brought my notes with anyway. It didn't end up being too bad, and I used up all of the pages of the blue book, plus two in a second. The more you write = the better your grade. Especially in an art history course.

I finished in under an hour and felt confident I had done well. I started to walk toward the bus stop and to make matters so much better, the Beckahs offered me a ride. Sweet. Feeling confident, I decided to attempt to sell back books. Utter failure. They took back 4 of my 10 and only gave me $9 for them. $9 for 4 books. Rip off? I think so. Corrupt fuckers.

I went home, deflated, to do the last of my packing. Leaving only my computer, my DVD case (I didn't want them to get cold) and my SM notebook out. I did more studying for Stage Management for about an hour, before catching the bus back to campus. That final was rather blah. There were some questions I wasn't really sure on, and the essays kicked my ass. Particularly: "A chorus member dies in an accident before a show. What do you tell the cast?" Bloody hell. I was fine with the cover letter, I think my preshow checklist was fine. I was a little sketch on the hierarchy of a theatre company, but earned versus unearned income I rocked. 6 essays at 25 points each. It sucked. But I strategically left so I could catch the bus without having to wait another half hour. I did the same with my French exam...but that I left without really finishing an essay. It had no closure, but I had nothing else to say. Oh well...it's all about getting home earlier.

I ended up out of my SM final at 4, instead of 4:45, so I got home at 4:30 instead of 5:30. I picked up the last of my things from the apartment...my computer, my DVDs and my purse (as previously state) and headed out. I said my 'goodbyes' to the roommates, quite tearfully but was more concerned about not thinking about it. Besides, I didn't want to be driving at night since I still have my headlight out.

I got out of Bloomington and onto 37 at 5pm, and drove...quickly...toward home. I got into Deerfield a little after 8pm and decided to stop by the winter Choral concert. I was there for the last 20 minutes, and then got to see some people. Allie was there to see her little sister Lauren, so I went back to their house and she and I hung out for a few hours, before I realized that I should really get to the apartment. I decided to leave everything out in the car overnight...it was too late and too cold to think about moving stuff. I only brought in my computer (I didn't want it to freeze!) and the bag with my toothbrush and toothpaste in it. Mom was still up at midnight when I got in, but neither of us stayed up very long.

This morning, I was up bright and early at 8am, so I decided to be productive and unloaded my car. I started to unpack...or as much as I could without having any place to put stuff. I was in the middle of laundry at 10:30 when my mom called and asked me to pick up Zoe from school. She has head lice...again. Eww. So I ran up to Antioch and took her home. Now I'm at my sister's house. And have been since 11:30. So much for being productive. I have no internet here, and Zoe monopolized the PS2 before I had a chance to steal it. I have no book with me to read, so I'm basically useless. I considered taking a nap, but decided against it. Zoe would have woken me up anyway, I assume.

So I'm here. And I don't know for how long. I feel horribly out of touch because of the no internet thing. No email or AIM and I go CRAZY! Because no one uses cell phones anymore...they are too personal, and we don't believe in being personal this day in age. ARG. Must. Get. Out.

Current Music: Path of Thorns - Sarah McLachlan

12/14/04, 4:32pm.
Larger than life is your fiction...
Seriously, getting to work after I post this. I promise.

However, I decided to take a little time to rant about the Golden Globe nominees. I'm a bit disappointed. Of course. There are just a couple categories where I'm thinking, I wouldn't pick any of them. Granted, I haven't seen ALL of these movies, but I've seen a fair few. Obviously I love the praise that Sideways is getting. Alexander Payne is my hero, after all. And Rolfe Kent should totally win for best score. BUY THE ALBUM, it's great. But where's Garden State? And I wouldn't give Jim Carrey a statue for Eternal Sunshine... if he were the only one in the category. I wasn't that impressed. Elijiah Wood and Mark Ruffalo were both superior...even Kirsten Dunst was awesome. And we're nominating Natalie Portman for Closer??? Are you fucking me? She was awful. The only reason she was nominated is because it's an amazing character...so give Philip Marber the award for play/screenplay. Julia Roberts was amazing in her role...twelve times better than she was in Erin Brockovich (which I'm still ambivalent about...sorry Steven Soderbergh). I'm obviously very much for Closer, though I think it's a little tricky. Because it's a play, and thus is based entirely on the characters and interactions and an intriguing storyline. It's not your typical Hollywood movie, because it is your typical play. So should it be recognized in cinema circles? And where is Jude Law? His best year yet and he gets nothing? For that matter, where is anyone in I heart Huckabees? Jude Law could have gotten supporting actor for that role. He was amazing.

And now, because the injustice of the Golden Globes will not yield to my complaints, I am exceedingly proud to be able to vote for the Independent Spirit Awards. How cool is that? Yes, by giving my $50 student dues and becoming a member of IFP, I am now able to not only receive all of the films through a free Netflix account set up for voters of the ISA, but vote for them. Rock on. So I will get to see a lot of movies I either missed when they were in the theatre, or which never made it out to bumble Bloomington while in their release. The nominees are here, if you're interested.

Alright. Studying until dinner with the roomies.

Current Music: Drifting - Sarah McLachlan

12/14/04, 3:42pm.
Living high on yesterday's lies...
I'm dedicating this post to Carly, because I know that she's procrastinating and reading it, and she's halfway done with her finals! Yay!

I took a nap...go being productive. This was after a good two hours of studying though. And oddly enough, I ended up talking to Matt Goldstick and Billy Nardini. WTF? I don't think I've seen these guys in 3 years, let alone talk to them ever. Bizarre!

Tonight, my roomies and I will be going out to dinner. Our last night as an apartment...ever. They are looking at apartments to rent for next year...three bedroom. No one is good enough to replace me. ;-)

So yeah. That's about it for my random update. Must. Not. Procrastinate.

Current Music: 0% Interest - Jason Mraz

12/14/04, 11:14am.
One down and three point six, tomorrow and I'm outta here...
One final done. Oh dear god, I'll be lucky if I get a C...seriously, I sucked. My French this morning at 8am was not on par, and the questions were so open ended, that I didn't even bullshit well.

The good news is, French is over. And we're crossing our fingers for a B as a final grade. Eep.

To make up for my crap final (and because it was a necessity), I went out and bough the extended edition of Return of the King. On Sunday, I had bought the previous two, as they were on sale this week at Best Buy. Total for all three: $75. Not too bad, considering they would usually be $30 each. Rock. And if I had 4 hours and 10 minutes of my time to waste, I would totally watch it. That and if I had a TV and DVD player. Not that that stopped me from watching Eddie Izzard's Glorious on Sunday night. I suck.

Today, I also purchased Christmas presents for the kids. While I was hoping to spend about $20 on each, buying them a cheap Gamecube or PS2 game...I ended up buying them each a new game, costing $50 each. Atrocious. So they better fucking like them. Michael's getting Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events and Zoe's getting Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door...both for Gamecube. I'm so fucking good to those kids. I'm the best aunt EVER. I buy them such good presents. And I take them to movies, where I buy them candy and drinks. And I take them to Barnes & Noble and buy them books. I'm so damn cool. And I just realized that, like my mother, I use money to show affection. Dammit. But I'm also spending time with them! That's the important part!!! Oy.

So, on the plate for today: finish studying for Picasso. The study session yesterday helped a lot as to directing me where to study. Prof. Kennedy gave us 5 main topics to concentrate on: Guernica/Charnel House, the effect of the Surrealists (in painting and sculpture), Marie-Therese (especially in Girl Before a Mirror and Reclining Nude, where she is organic/biomorphic), the War (and how he never depicted scenes, but instead painted Bull's Head and Nude Dressing her hair), and finally, his post-war period of joy and childlike art (especially his rival of Matisse in Picasso's version of Joy of Life). I think I know it all pretty well.

And then there's Stage Management. David is known for having some of the most difficult test. I need to re-memorize the unions (AGMA, Equity, IATSE, and two more...damn) as well as Equity rules of working (7 of 9 hours, etc). Those suck ass. And then there's the entirety of the second half of the semester. I hate cumulative finals. Note to self: study how to write a cover letter and go over the tax forms for being self employed (1099, Schedule C and Schedule SE). I'm semi-terrified. I'm barely holding down an A-...and this fucker is worth 200 points (20% of my final grade).

Well, that was all very interesting for you, I'm sure. Apologies for being boring while I attempt to cram things in my head by writing them out.

Okay, enough procrastinating. It's time to study. After I go get a couple cookies...

Current Music: One Down and Three Point Six - Ben Folds (in head)

12/13/04, 9:03pm.
...
So, some very disturbing news. Yesterday, there were three cops cars surrounding our area of the apartment complex, and later an ambulance arrived. Katie said she saw our neighbor Mike (who lives down a floor and kitty-corner from us) get into the ambulance with a bandage on his head. He was up and moving around, so he was fine enough. We were intrigued, of course, and Katie said that the next time she saw him, she would ask what happened.

Well, it just so happens she saw him today in the Rental Office. Yesterday, some guys broke into his apartment, with guns, and beat him up. He had to get stitches in his head.

While we aren't sure if the guys followed him home, or knew him prior or anything...we do know that Mike is gay, and we're kinda leaning toward it was a hate crime. Which is absolutely disgusting, especially that it would happen where we live. And we usually keep our door unlocked, which we have now decided will never happen, regardless of how many people are home at the time.

I wish I had more details, but that's it, really. I don't know if the police caught the guys who did it, or if they will. I don't know if it was a random target, or even if it was a crime of hate and intolerance. It just makes me really upset that people like that exist in the world. People who would break into someone's apartment solely to abuse and mistreat them. It's disgusting.

The only thing I could think was, "thank god they didn't shoot him." Needless to say, Mike is staying in a hotel for the rest of finals week. And I believe he was planning on moving at the semester anyhow. Jesus, the time has come for a change.

Current Music: Justin just screamed at a horror movie they're watching.

12/13/04, 2:00pm.
Follow the man, follow the man, with his pockets full of the jam...
I have a feeling the next few days will include many posts, due to procrastination. This is one such post. I've been half-heartedly trying to study, to no avail. Frankly, I don't care about George Sand or her stupid book. And Picasso and I are in a fight right now. Then there's stage management, which I am not even planning on starting to study for until tomorrow.

But alas, I have a French study session at 5pm, and so I should have some sort of contribution. Which means I should theoretically read La Mare au Diable and not be a terrible mooch. Although I have realized that (as in English), I am very good and not reading and still picking up the meaning and plot, and all of that important stuff. Unlike English, however, I am less confused when I don't read. This book sucks. It was written in 1846 and is so grossly boring. Think Charles Dickens...in French. It's excruciating.

Enough of that. After my French study session, there is an optional Picasso review, but I'd have to come with questions prepared. And I don't think I have any questions, I just want to try to absorb more. I guess if I studied more for that, then I might find a question. Bah humbug.

Final schedule:
Tuesday, 8-10am - French
Wednesday, 10:15-12:15am - Picasso
Wednesday, 2:45-4:45pm - Stage Management

With any luck, I'll be out of my SM final a bit early, and can get back to the apartment by 5pm, then packed up and on the road by 6pm. Taking the time change into account, I should get into Lake Bluff before 10pm. 56 hours from now. Boy, I am ready.

Current Music: Christmas Bells - RENT

12/13/04, 12:23pm.
...
M'aidez!!! (or as you silly Americans say "Mayday!")

For anyone who knows Gamecube Games...what would be good ones for an 8 and an 11 year old? I was thinking Super Mario Sunshine and possibly Kirby's Air Ride or Wario World? (They already have Double Dash and Super Smash...)

I'm such a bad aunt. I have no idea what they'd want. I use to be on the cutting edge of these things. Damn college...getting in the way of my family relationships!

I know my nephew wants Grand Theft Auto...but I can't justify buying him that. Especially when I didn't buy him a GI Joe for his birthday, because I don't condone violence or military action. Buying him GTA would be hypocritical.

Arg. And now, while I take time from researching stupid games on amazon.com, I shall attempt to study. Finals, wha?

Current Music: Sisters - Rosemary Clooney and that other woman (from White Christmas)

12/12/04, 3:01pm.
...
Oh Steven Soderbergh, what did I do to deserve you? I just got back from seeing Ocean's Twelve.

Squee, party of me.

While the first surpasses in heist (I mean, come on. It took at least three viewings to even TRY to figure out what the hell was going on). But the second was just hilarious. Like, I was sitting by myself and cracking up. Cameos by Topher Grace and Bruce Willis were simply to die for. Robbie Coltrane made me giddy, and when Eddie Izzard came on, I audibly gasped and the girl next to me looked at me like I was crazy (as she obviously don't know of the supreme greatness of Mr. Eddie Izzard). The Julia Roberts part was a little hokey, but it worked. There were a several things that I was like "But wait..." (including Matt Damon's acting, the prison set-up, the warehouse, and Linus's interrogation). However, by the time it got to the end, I laughed and said "so clever" and it all made sense in the end. Much like the first.

I want to speak more specifically about it, but I don't want to spoil anything. I didn't really like Catherine Zeta-Jones, but it's been a while since I've liked her work. Entrapment and Mask of Zorro were probably the last. And her tits are HUGE. Brad Pitt was lovely and Don Cheadle didn't have enough scenes. Lastly, Vincent Cassel is MINE. YOU can't have him, I lay dibs!!!! (He really reminded me of my French teacher from Spring semester. Hee hee...he was cute too. And French. *swoon*)

That's it for now. I might try to study, or something. Or try to convince my roommates that they all want to see Ocean's Twelve tonight, so I can see it again. :-)

Current Music: Abandonning the Wedding - Rolfe Kent (from Sideways Soundtrack)

12/11/04, 11:41pm.
Pain is a sign that something's wrong...
Well, the show is over. Finally. The last show kinda sucked because we had some major lighting issues and the house lights were on for the entirety of Act 2 (about 25 minutes). Most of the audience seemed not to notice...but the stress and anxiety on headsets were enough to give a girl an aneurism.

But it's over. And I found out that ASMs don't have to be at strike. So I'm free all of tomorrow, to study and maybe to see Ocean's Twelve.

It's weird being in an empty room. Me, my laptop and my bed...the only things I really have. I'll probably get to bed soon, I'm exhausted.

Slight redesign of this site. It's boring, I know, but I kinda like the simplicity of it. The old images were just getting stale. And now, if you have the capacity to Facebook (aka...a college email address), I have a link to my profile. Friend me, I like to feel special.

And now, I'm going to relax and hope the knots in my shoulder go away on their own. Much love to all.

Current Music: Power of Goodbye - Madonna

12/11/04, 12:37pm.
There'll be no more sorrow, no grief or pain...
Phase one of moving is complete.

After the show last night, I went to the hotel my parents and niece were staying at and visited with them for about an hour before coming home. Then this morning I woke up at 8:30am, expecting them at 9, and showered and started to do all the things I said I was going to do before they got here. I emptied my closet and dresser of anything I wouldn't need in the next 5 days. I wrapped all my breakable dishes in newspaper (they were all already out, so I didn't have to separate my kitchenware from everyone else's). I took down most of my posters and did a little cleaning to organize further what was staying and what was leaving.

The family arrived around 9:45 and we started the packing. My closet is bare, save for a couple pairs of pants, all of my sweatshirts and my laundry hamper. My dresser has only comfy long-sleeved t-shirts and tank tops (good for layering in the cold). All of my books except for one small box containing about 10, have been packed and gone. As has my book shelf. My printer is gone, as is my TV, VCR and both DVD players (my room and the living room). Despite this, I couldn't part with my DVD case, though my CD case and TV-shows-on-DVD case have been packed. My external hard drive is gone, as is an array of cords, cables, power strips and more electronic wiring than any one person should need. I'm special I guess. I still have my computer (obviously) and lampy. Most of the rest of my desk is empty.

My nightstand is gone, so my alarm clock is currently living on my cooler, which has been tipped sideways. The posters and framed pictures are down from the walls of my room and the living room/kitchen. Except Cinderella...that poster remains up for a couple days. I still have all of my bathroom stuff to take care of, as well as my VHS tapes that didn't manage to get packed. That, clothes and the little stuff like pens, paper, a candle or two are the only things remaining in the apartment...and the only things I will have to pack come Wednesday.

*breathe*

I was considering taking myself to see Ocean's Twelve...but I'm kinda tired and I think I need some down time today. Maybe tomorrow after strike I'll go. I hope I won't be there long. I'm not really in the mood for strike.

Alright. I'm gonna go try to nap. Or just lay around and listen to some music and try to relax. We'll see. I have 5 hours before I should get ready for closing night. It feels like we've done way more than 7 shows already.

Current Music: Please Come Home For Christmas - Vonda Shepard

12/08/04, 4:08pm.
I've looked at love that way...
While working hard (or hardly working) on my current paper, I did a little sidetrack to Google to find out "What is it about Chicago?" In one episode of The West Wing, Jed Bartlett comments: "What is it with people from Chicago, they're so happy to have been born there? I meet so many people who can't wait to tell me they're from Chicago..." to which, of course, Leo responds simply, "You wouldn't understand."

With that quote in mind, and the fact that I'm writing a paper comparing Renoir to Carl Sandburg's Chicago, I thought I'd ask Google..."what is it about Chicago"? Following are some results of completions to the phrase:
What is it about Chicago...
- that is so unique?
- that makes it a great city and a great city to write about?
- that keeps giving us men like this?
- players and not being able to make up their minds?
- that makes musicians so willing to put their egos in their pockets and fuse things together?
- that turns you on?
- and writers who just can't get this city out of their blood?
- that makes it your first choice?
- and NY that cause such emotion and desire to return?

These were just from the first page of Google results, so if you actually want to know the answers to these questions, you either have to visit the site or (since most of these are hypothetical questions) look to the gods and formulate your own response.

And now...back to the paper. Blah.

And having answered so I turn once more to those who sneer at this my
     city, and I give them back the sneer and say to them:
Come and show me another city with lifted head singing so proud to be
     alive and coarse and strong and cunning.
- Carl Sandburg, Chicago (1916).

Current Music: Both Sides Now - Joni Mitchell

12/06/04, 10:43pm.
...
My plan was to get to bed early tonight. Which I will still attempt to do, but I don't know how successful I will be with Dawn of the Dead playing loudly in the other room, and the subsequent screams of the four watching it.

To top it all off, I don't feel well. I'm kinda achy...my back hurts, my head hurts a lot, and all that fun stuff. General blah. I think I should eat something, but it's not good to eat right before you go to sleep, blah blah blah. And really, the only thing that sounds good right now is a fried chicken salad from Applebees, but I don't think they serve this late. Maybe tomorrow for lunch? I received some money from Mama in a card today, so I may as well put it to good use.

In other news, the run of the show is not even half way through. Dear god. Tonight was fine though. I've said it before, but if I didn't like the cast so much, I would probably absolutely loath the entire thing.

I'm getting to bed. Haven't been sleeping well lately either. So that's fun.

Current Music: The chaos of Zombies attacking a population. Ya know, the norm.

12/06/04, 3:18pm.
...
Since I've pretty well exhausted the topic of current movies, especially with my three-in-one-day exploit yesterday...I thought I'd switch to the topic of upcoming films. This being due to the fact that I've seen a lot of previews lately and that out of the 15 movies playing in Bloomington currently, I have seen 7 of them. The remaining 8 include Spongebob Square Pants, Saw, and the infamous Christmas With the Kranks. That said, I will not be pursuing any other films this week.

Upcoming, however, we have some possible gems. First, The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou. Words cannot express how entirely psyched I am for this film. The cast is orgasmically good, adding Willem Dafoe and Cate Blanchett to the already amazing Wes Anderson alumnae of Bill Murray, Owen Wilson and Angelica Huston. Plus, it looks significantly more uplifting than The Royal Tennenbaums.

Then, there's a British film being released in the US thought Fox Searchlight called Millions, which looks thought provoking and feel-good about a kid who finds a briefcase of money. His brother wants to spend it all on themselves, while the younger boy wants to do good with it. The kid also has a vivid imagination, often envisioning and having conversations with saints in heaven. Looks different and intriguing.

Yesterday, I saw a preview for Imaginary Heroes. Dysfunctional family stories always make me feel better about my own family, and this one is not only looks like a good dark comedy, but it has a good cast. Sigourney Weaver stars at mother of the family, and an avid pot smoker. I am happily receptive to her return, as the last big movies for her were Heartbreakers and Galaxy Quest, sandwiching the turn of the century. Jeff Daniels plays patriarch to the Travis family and the estranged daughter is played by Michelle Williams (of Dawson's Creek fame), but actually looks like she can act in this. Written and directed by Dan Harris who has done little in his past career save for writing X2. His other upcoming projects (a year or more down the line) include Superman Returns and Ender's Game.

Finally, The Aviator, which I hadn't seen a preview for until yesterday, looks quite interesting. Again, Cate Blanchett, starring opposite Leonardo DiCaprio, who if you look past the Titanic stigma, is a very talented actor. I don't know much about the life of Howard Hughes, or anything that the film focuses on, but I can tell you that the preview definitely caught my attention. And with Martin Scorsese behind it all, it certainly can't be bad. Sub-par possibly, but far from bad.

Now, in more immediate upcoming events:
Ocean's Twelve should hit most theatres this Friday and I know that I for one am extremely excited. Nothing like a heist movie to please me (yes, I'm that easy), but add in fabulous actors like George Clooney, Don Cheadle, Julia Roberts and still-heartthrob Brad Pitt, AND set it in Europe? Nothing can go wrong here. Even if the plot sucks and the acting is worse, I will probably still love it and indeed, Steven Soderberg knows the way to a woman's heart...or at least to mine.

The next week (that of December 17th) offers many more films, just in time for the busy holiday season. A few hit or miss here, including Spanglish and A Very Long Engagement. The first being the next exploit of Adam Sandler, but not the typical late 90's Sandler. It also isn't Punch Drunk Love...but perhaps a happy medium. A comedy with family values. Not sure how it will play out, but I'm intrigued enough to see it after I've checked the rest off my list. The later being a Jean-Pierre Jeunet child, and a War drama at that. I don't know how many movies I can endure with the message of love surviving war, but perhaps being French, it won't be too offensive. I still have yet to see Cold Mountain, and frankly have no desire to do so. A Very Long Engagement seems to be quite the same. Perhaps hard to motivate yourself to see, knowing it will be dramatic and well over 2 hours. Movies like this always feel like a commitment to me. And perhaps it's the small amount of man inside me, but commitment makes me bored. This would actually probably hit the list under Spanglish, though it does have the cultural capital attached to it because it's foreign, and probably headed for some limited release.

Also that week is a Clint Eastwood film Million Dollar Baby with Hilary Swank, Morgan Freeman, and Eastwood himself. The plot is one of a woman trying to become a boxer with Eastwood as her trainer, but the interesting aspect is the deception of Eastwood. He apparently has issues staying in one place and some deep dark secret in his past. As a priest says in the preview, "The only man who comes to church that often, is one who can't forgive himself for something." With Swank playing a roll as surrogate daughter, we can assume it has something to do, perhaps, with Eastwood abandoning his family, or even being responsible for some tragedy involving loved ones in his past.

Finally that week, for the youngin's, Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events. While I generally dislike Jim Carrey, the movie interests me in that I may consider taking the niece and nephew to it. My nephew has been reading the books, or should have been. I bought him the first in the series, so I assume he's putting it to good use. Meryl Streep co-stars, and while only Jude Law's voice is heard, it's a damn sexy voice. Law has certainly made leaps and bounds in this past year, with I Heart Huckabees, Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, Alfie, Closer and soon, The Aviator. Add in the voice work for Lemony Snicket and I'd say he's had a pretty successful year. When you're at the peak of your game, you better cash in, or soon you'll be back to where you started. Kudos to him.

And with that, I've sufficiently wasted another hour of my time, and really should get to writing that paper I have due in three days. Especially considering that my brief one-day hiatus from "Happy Birthday, Wanda June!" has now passed and I have another 6 fun-filled nights of show. So. How does Carl Sandburg's "Chicago" compare to Renoir's "Luncheon of the Boaters"? Anyone? Bueller?

Current Music: None of my own. I need quiet to concentrate. Unfortuantely my roommate Katie needs the exact opposite, so I've been listening to a lot of Ben Folds, The Big Chill soundtrack, etc. and her vocal stylings assisting in those drifting from her room.

12/05/04, 5:04pm.
Oh what a Christmas to have the blues...
You know that feeling when you go into a restaurant or other food establishment and you know EXACTLY what you want to get. Like it sounds sooooo good. Then you get it and it's better than you could have expected?

Totally just had that at Panera.

Usually, I'm disappointed if I'm REALLY in the mood for something, when it comes it never quite lives up to the expectation. But this Bacon Turkey Bravo sandwich is absolutely to die for.

In other news, I've spent my late morning/afternoon at the cinema. Seeing two movies, so far. Closer and Kinsey, both of which I've been waiting impatiently to see for well over three weeks. Closer was very good. Held true to the integrity of the play (which I was fortunately enough to see at Northwestern 2(?) years ago). Excellent acting, strong cast...no, AMAZING cast. Well, except Natalie Portman. I thought her performance was disappointing and often seemed to bring down scenes, even when the other acting was very good. Initially, I thought she'd be good for the role of Alice, but there was something not quiet right...like she hadn't invested enough emotion into the character and was playing off the surface and directly from the script. I would usually yell "director flaw!" but Jude Law, Clive Owen and Julia Roberts all gave extraordinary performances. Besides, it's Mike Nichols, and he isn't one to just fuck up like that (please note: The Graduate, Angels in America, and everyone's favorite The Birdcage among several others).

Kinsey was a very different tone, and yet both had to deal with the theme of sex and love, as well as all subsets (such as sex without love, etc.). My comparative literature professor recently went off on a tangent about Kinsey, noting it's flaws and elements he was hoping would have been better. First off, that there was no "Bloomington" in the film, and indeed, nothing from actual campus is noticeable in the film. While I don't believe this deterred from the message of the film, I too believe it would have been stronger if their home base of Bloomington were more well defined. He also doted on the fact that the Kinsey House in the film is nothing like the actually Kinsey house, which is still present here in Bloomington and he disliked the utter disregard for fact. However, Professor Maiorino did approve of the portrayal of Herman B. Wells (played by Oliver Platt). As a man who knew the real Wells when he was still alive, working with him for several years, Professor Maiorino was impressed with the accurate characterization of one of the most compassionate presidents this university and perhaps any university has seen. Caring and outreaching to faculty and students alike, Wells fought for Kinsey and his cause.

Back to a review, though...a main complaint of Prof. Maiorino was that the movie was too scientific and lacked a strong plot line. To this, I would really have to agree. While interesting the journey to complete his sex studies was not always compelling, as an audience member. There was also a great deal of discontinuity, placing emphasis on certain events and skimming over others. While this is a practice in most films, I felt it became a fatal flaw when all of a sudden I realized that Kinsey's book on female sexuality has been released and he was working on his third (a plot point I felt was rather important, considering his struggle to release this book due to financial problems. Though in retrospect (and even as I sat in the theatre) I could tell when we were supposed to assume the book had been released, it was not at all obvious or momentous. Also, the lawsuit brought against Kinsey was difficult to follow, as it wasn't explored in depth at all, and yet it caused the downfall of his entire study. The reason Kinsey needed funding near the end was to pay off the lawyers working on the lawsuit, yet the lawsuit was unclear and seemingly brushed over as unimportant.

Overall, however, I thought the movie to be very interesting. Not something to rent and watch with the parents (and I stress that point), but it was worth the 118 minutes. While Liam Neeson and Laura Linney's performances were on par and thoroughly expected, I was highly impressed by those of John Lithgow (whom I don't usually enjoy), as well as Tim Curry and Oliver Platt. While Curry and Platt often give good performances, in this case, they seemed to be above par, especially for each being a bit part. Enjoyable, really, to watch. Lithgow was quite excellent and I stress the fact that I don't usually like him or his roles at all. I found him quite intriguing in the role and was slightly disappointed that he wasn't more prevalent. Then again, his character didn't really have the capacity to be more prevalent. Finally, Peter Sarsgaar played an interesting character and did so that I was compelled to focus on him in every scene he was in.

On a must-see level, I would give Closer a nod for amazing performances and a good story line. Possible Oscars await some of my favorite and snubbed actors, as well as possible screenplay? Kinsey is worth the time, but it's up to you whether it's worth the money. Perhaps a matinee screening? It's enjoyable, but not incredibly noteworthy in my opinion...but let me think about it for a bit. Depending on how a film resonates, it usually will change my opinion.

Next on the agenda is Sideways which I've almost KILLED MYSELF waiting to see. Alexander Payne is my hero, so tonight at 10:25, I will be attending a viewing at Showplace East. My justification for spending $20 on movies today is that yesterday, I found $20 from my mom that she had sent me in October and I didn't even know about. So, I'm treating myself today. That, and the last time I saw a movie was Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason on November 13th! For me that's fucking nuts. I even emailed my mom last Thursday to tell her I'd probably be going to see a movie because I've been going through withdrawal. How true that is! When all my big plans to see a few good movies in Boston backfired, and then tech started, I was panicking whether I would ever get to catch up on all my necessary viewing. Of course, I still have plenty to go. Finding Neverland, National Treasure and Alexander (while not high on my list) are still appealing to me. And by getting back home, I have the options of Being Julia (I love Annette Bening) and The Motorcycle Diaries at the artsy theatres that Bloomington lacks. I'm utterly surprised that we have Sideways playing, accept that Alexander Payne is an established director with Citizen Ruth, Election, and About Schmidt under his belt.

*breathe* Enough about film. I have a paper to write for Professor Maiorino due on Thursday, and I must get going now or I fear I won't until Wednesday. Which would suck. Besides, I have 5 hours before I must be off to the show, and thus, plenty of time to get at least an introductory paragraph under my belt. ;-)

Current Music: Please Come Home For Christmas - Vonda Shepard (in head)

12/02/04, 10:53pm.
...
Well, if the rest of the shows go like it did tonight...I might commit acts of treason and possibly murder. The show itself was fine, but not much else provided positive feeling. The past two nights I've had to talk down the other ASM who of course has been really upset by the treatment we're receiving from the SM. I will be so fucking glad on December 11th when not only does the show close, but I'll never have to think about the IU Theatre Program ever again if I don't want to. For a while there, I was hoping things had improved...but no. Of course not.

So now I'm watching South Park: Bigger, Longer, Uncut, which is unfortunately one of those movies for which you have to be "in the right mood." I am not in such a mood. So I'm going to eat an entire pint of sorbet and possibly put in a feel-good movie...like Love Actually. Always makes me feel so much better.

*sigh* Maybe I'll start to pack. I only have a week until I need to have everything, well, almost everything, out.

Current Music: Musical numbers from South Park.